In pictures and videos one side of my face looks droopy, one eye bigger then the other, one side of my face looks higher. Why is this?

Its not only in pictures that it looks like that. It looks like that in real life too. But you are used to seeing yourself in the mirror so you're used your imperfections "flipped" i.e. the mirror image. So when you see a video or photograph, you see how you REALLY look to other people (not the mirror image). You are not used to seeing the real you so that's why you think you look weird in photos or video. You're only used to seeing the mirror image you.

You are used to seeing your mirror image. Photos look different

i tried telling someone that that Hunchback from Notre Dame was a real thing - must be a relative

Maybe you have a lazy eye?